


John: be the voyeur

by LaughingStones



Series: Cavernstuck [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Cavernstuck, F/M, Initial sibling squick, Multi, No Incest, Pesterlogs are my new nemesis, Sex, Three hours of sleep I am so tired I can't tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-21
Updated: 2014-10-21
Packaged: 2018-02-21 23:59:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2487044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaughingStones/pseuds/LaughingStones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alternate title was Karkat:  get caught spying.<br/>The trolls are demons, (but no more evil), the humans are angels, (and no more virtuous).<br/>John and Jade have been aware of their demonic visitor for a while.   Jade decides to do something about it.   John isn't sure why in his sister's mind "do something" translates to "have sex with the demon".</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling](https://archiveofourown.org/works/385399) by [Asuka Kureru (Askerian)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Askerian/pseuds/Asuka%20Kureru). 



> This is it. Chronologically the first fic in Cavernstuck, this is my version of the events described in Asuka's delightful chatlog-fic.
> 
> I owe my soul to my beloved cousin and beta Rhea314.

GG: john dont look now but our visitors back!!!  
GG: hes under the window again :D  
EB: jeez, does he really think we won't notice him? i mean, i can feel him breathing!  
GG: why would he know that, dumbbutt? hes a demon not an angel, he doesnt know anything about us!  
EB: well you would think if he was so interested in learning more he would just ask!   
EB: this whole lurking and spying thing is just dumb.  
GG: maybe hes scared?  
GG: you know what with the WAR and everything  
EB: yeah but not here! WE aren't at war and neither are they!  
EB: why would he be scared of us?  
GG: dont ask me dummy, cant you just check his breathing and stuff to see if he is?  
EB: ...fine.  
EB: huh. kind of shallow and quick. so, not necessarily scared but definitely tense.  
EB: let's see, the breeze says his skin temperature is about like ours, but his tail is hot.  
GG: hehehe ill say!!  
EB: ...groan, jade. i guess i walked into that one...  
EB: huh, his back is also warmer - ohhh, where his wings are missing.  
GG: :( its so sad!  
EB: yeah.   
EB: i kind of wish we knew what happened, you know? how does a demon lose his wings?  
GG: i dont think we really want to know though!  
GG: but yeah, kind of  
GG: so do you think hes as hot as we are today? i think demons are supposed to like high temperatures!!  
EB: i don't really - oh. oh!  
GG: what?!  
EB: wow.  
EB: jade, maybe you should put your shirt back on.  
GG: what?? why?!?   
GG: john stop trying to change the subject, what about the demon!! >:(  
EB: this IS about him, he is a MALE DEMON, jade, and according to the air temperature next to his skin he is definitely kind of overheated right now!  
GG: wow so it's hot even for him!  
GG: which is why my shirt is off and not going back on :P  
EB: jade, his face is way hotter than the rest of his skin, he is obviously blushing like crazy.  
EB: you are making the poor guy uncomfortable.  
GG: ohhhhh!!!  
GG: well who says its me, mr smarty-pants!  
GG: youre wearing less than i am!  
EB: only because you like wearing miles of fluffy skirt! i have shorts on, i am totally decent.  
GG: you got those from jake didnt you. theyre very small shorts ;)  
EB: bluh, i know, but it is really hot! stop with the winky face already.  
GG: so theres no reason to think im the problem!   
GG: maybe he likes angel boys with really nice butts!! :D  
EB: jaaaade!  
EB: stop talking about my butt, it's weird! :/  
GG: okay fiiine  
GG: but im not putting my shirt back on  
EB: fine, but if his head explodes from too much blood to the face, i am completely blaming you!  
GG: and im blaming you! :P  
EB: :P  
GG: hehe  
GG: so you really think hes blushing because were all half-naked and stuff?  
EB: well, he's never blushed before! why else?  
GG: but that doesnt make any sense!   
GG: HES half-naked!!  
EB: your magnificent female form is just too much for him.  
GG: or your pretty bishi bod!!  
EB: oh my god.  
EB: jade. no, jade.  
EB: you're not allowed to talk to dirk ever, ever again.  
GG: soooooo? what are we gonna do?!  
EB: huh?  
EB: about what?  
GG: duuuhhh, about the pretty blushy demon boy!!!  
EB: i don't know!  
EB: what is there to do about him?  
GG: ...heheheheh  
EB: jade, that is very ominous laughter even in text. okay, why are you grinning like that?  
GG: maybe instead of doing anything about him, we should just do him!!  
EB: uh. wow.  
EB: that sounds like a great idea, totally safe, with no way it could go wrong!  
EB: jade, are you serious?! he's a demon!  
GG: a really cute, short, harmless demon! whos been watching us for a week now without hurting anyone or anything  
GG: did you know hes been sleeping in a knothole near the lower branches?  
GG: bec found him!!  
GG: but he didnt startle him because i told him not to  
EB: he is the best guard-demon-dog. it is him.  
GG: its true!  
GG: but john thats a reeaally long way down  
GG: and he doesnt have wings!!!  
EB: i know, he climbs like a lizard, but it still can't be easy getting up and down.  
EB: even with claws.  
GG: yeah :(  
EB: so... you want to have pity-sex with him because he doesn't have wings?  
GG: nooooo dummy!!   
GG: i want to have sex with him because hes all cute and sneaky and he thinks were hot and im bored and horny and curious!  
EB: and he's a demon who's been spying on us, and we don't know why!  
GG: joooohhhn!  
GG: if you were that worried about it you would have told dad about it!!!  
GG: or at least talked to rose, i mean youve had a whole week to warn people oh no, theres a cute little blunt-horned demon watching me and jade when he thinks were not looking, im sure hell kill us all in our sleep!!! :|  
EB: ...  
GG: dont you dot dot dot at me, mister!  
EB: actually... i did kind of mention it to dad. the second day.  
EB: it just seemed really irresponsible not to let people know there was a demon sneaking around, okay?!  
GG: oh my god, john!! :o  
GG: sooooo???  
GG: what did he say?!?!  
EB: he told me how to look out for all kinds of demon magic, spying, attacking, controlling, you know, and said he trusted in our good sense to let him know if the demon made any sort of hostile move.  
GG: huh  
GG: i should have guessed hed be sensible about it!!  
GG: so, if he thinks its safe, why not??  
EB: uh, he thinks it's safe to keep an eye on him while he's hanging around, not have sex with the demon, jade!  
GG: look you dumbbutt if the demons wanted to send a spy wouldnt they send someone who could fly???  
GG: we live in a really big TREE  
GG: and maybe a full-grown ADULT??  
GG: all this guy has done in the past week is stay hidden and watch us!  
GG: thats not very threatening!!  
GG: and besides if youre really worried its dumb to just wonder what hes up to when we could just ask him!  
EB: i'm not sure he'd tell you the truth, but i guess we probably should talk to him at some point.  
GG: and then when we know for sure hes harmless we can have sex!!!  
EB: jade, no!  
EB: i am not having sex with the demon!  
EB: we don't even know if he's really interested, skin temperature is not surefire evidence at all.  
GG: so thats one of the things ill ask him! :D  
EB: dammit, jade!  
GG: i know you think hes cute too, why are you so against having some fun?!?  
EB: because he could be DANGEROUS!  
GG: alright fine mr boring dumb dumb!  
GG: you go somewhere else and ill interrogate the demon and then have hot sex with him!!!  
EB: fine! but for fuck's sake be careful. i know you're a badass, but i only have one sister, you know!  
GG: awwwww! :)  
GG: dont worry, worrywart, ill be careful!  
EB: all right. ...i know bec will be there if you need help, but message me too, okay?  
GG: do you want me to send you updates on the scorching hot sex too??  
EB: no. no, that's really okay.  
EB: um.  
EB: good luck, i guess.  
GG: thanks!! byyyyye!  
EB: ...yeah.


	2. Chapter 2

John wasn't about to hang around while Jade put the moves on that demon, but he didn't really want to get too far away, either. What if she needed him? So he flew out the front door of the one-room cottage Jane had shaped for them from the outer stretch of a branch and went straight up into the foliage, where the demon wouldn't be able to see him. Since Jade was assuming he was gone, she wouldn't think to check nearby spaces for him, either.

He stood on the branch above and breathed a minute, waving his wings gently. Air-plants and moss grew in patches across the branch and a flowering orchid hung down nearby. Cicada-song rose and fell in waves all around, tree frogs trilled, and birds called sporadically. Distantly from the next tree over he heard Jane and Roxy singing shaping songs, probably remodeling their own place again.

It really was hot, even for summer, and the air sang very quietly without much of a breeze. He could always hear the song, of course, even when the air was utterly still, and he hummed back in a friendly way under his breath. The blue swirls on his arms glowed faintly as power slipped into the notes, and the air responded by helpfully carrying up sounds from the cottage. Jade was rearranging the collection of bones and interesting rocks she'd been looking at on their shelf, to judge by the clacking noises. Then he heard a chortle and she said, "Bec! Fetch, boy!"

There was the characteristic quiet sound of air imploding as the demon-dog vanished. A soft popping sound heralded the reappearance outside, accompanied by a sort of grating snarl-yelp noise that made John scramble to persuade the air to refract right and show him the scene where Jade was _right now._ That noise was not Bec, and if it was the demon, he sounded a lot more dangerous than Jade was assuming.

_Poof, pop_. "Good boy, Bec!" he heard as the image stabilized. At first he was staring up at the bright string of glow-shells running across the smooth wood ceiling, lighting up the room. Then he adjusted, and there was Jade smiling at Bec, whose teeth were set in one ragged pantleg as the demon scrabbled backwards across the floor, trying to pull away from his grip. John caught his breath in a startled huff of laughter. The demon's short, bushy hair was almost on end, making him look like an alarmed cat.

"So, Mr. Demon, you've been watching us for a while now! Have you learned anything interesting?"

"What the nookchafing, pancrushing fuck," he rasped after a minute. His voice was rough, deeper than John had expected from his size. He pronounced everything so oddly that it took a moment to realize he was mostly speaking the same language, vowels slanting, consonants snapping out. "How the fuck did you know - What is this, the interrogarroting before you have your mini-Cerberus rip me apart? How completely fucking typical, I come up here to get the fuck away from all the moronic feuding and back-stabbing and now I'm going to die the painful, pointless death I always knew was waiting for me. Great, fine, what-the-fuck-ever. Let's get it over with already."

Holy shit he talked a lot! John sat down on the branch and arranged his wings comfortably, since violence didn't seem imminent.

"No, silly!" Jade said. "Why would I want to kill you? I just want to ask you some questions."

"Of course, because I would be so fucking lucky. Do what you want, I don't give a fuck. Just - I - I may be a shitblood, but I'm no fucking traitor. So do what you want, but I won't - I'm not betraying my people."

Geez, that was pretty melodramatic! Even as he snorted a little, though, John's throat felt sort of funny, because he couldn't see the demon's face but the line of his shoulders was taut and his body hunched like he was expecting to be hurt. He looked like he was waiting for an attack, except that he didn't seem prepared to defend himself at all.

Maybe if the angle of refraction shifted just a bit, his face would come into view. That seemed important suddenly.

"Betraying?" Jade said. "No! Why would I want that, dumbass!? It's not like I want to restart the war here, you know! I just want to know why you've been hanging around watching us for days!" Green and white wings ruffled with her vehemence.

As John's view shifted to the side, she crossed her arms, shell bracelets clinking together, and even with her long hair partly obscuring the view - she really should've put a shirt on, dammit. The spirals and swoops of green on her brown skin were visible across her arms and chest, and John worried a moment before he remembered the demon couldn't read them, wouldn't know from them how to counter her power. He probably couldn't even read the signs on the dyed wooden beads and pearls of her necklace.

The demon's thick brows were drawn in a scowl and he was chewing on one lip, but John saw when the grey skin across his cheeks began to go ruddy. His eyes were flicking nervously around, but they kept returning to just above Jade's crossed arms and then wrenching hastily away again. ...His irises were the same color as Dave's! That was sort of cool.

He growled a little. "Because I'm a crackpanned, sponge-rotted, tailsucking oozing glob of failure on legs, without the common sense of a lump of mold! Any normal demon would've stayed in the caverns, and if they went Above they sure as fuck wouldn't climb an angel tree, and if for some reason they did, displaying the sort of pan-numbing stupidity that should have guaranteed choking on their own saliva and dying as an imp, they would still be fucking smarter than me, because they would have stayed the fuck away from the angels!"

By now he was waving his arms around, gesturing so angrily that Bec vanished and reappeared at Jade's side to avoid the flailing. Aside from pulling his freed leg in closer, the demon barely seemed to notice. "But no, at every turn I must prove that I'm the greatest mistake ever hatched, so when I get unreasonably curious and find a tree with only two angels flying from it on a daily basis, I somehow believe there's the faintest chance I can study and observe them without getting myself fucking caught! I think, 'I've never seen an angel. I know nothing about them. I should go watch some and see what they're like. This is objectively a good plan, with no potential to go horrendously awry.' Except that objectively speaking I'm a nookwhiffing mutant disaster and completely incapable of having a genuinely good idea even if you engraved one on the inside of my sponge-case!"

"That doesn't sound very objective at all!" Jade interrupted, frowning. "You can't say that you're a disaster and expect me to believe you're being objective. It sounds like you have enough issues you can't really see yourself with any detachment at all! You should maybe work on that."

"Right, I'll be sure to put that at the top of my to-do list for the afterlife. 'Number One: stop being such a total bulgemunching disaster.'"

"Ugh!" Jade put her hands on her hips and glared, wings mantling. The hair draped over her shoulders and partly hiding her chest shifted. The demon's eyes widened and then jerked away as he flushed a darker red. "Why won't you listen when I tell you I'm not going to kill you?!" Jade demanded.

"Oh, I don't know, maybe because your pet caught me fucking spying on your home?!"

Bec had flopped onto his side by now behind Jade and gave every sign of being fast asleep.

"So? We knew you were there, idiot! We were waiting for you to get up the nerve to come and talk to us, or do _something!_ But you just kept hanging around trying to hide, so I decided to talk to you instead."

"How the _fuck_ \- How long did you know I was there?"

"I knew as soon as you started the climb up the tree!"

John made a face. He was still annoyed with her about that. _He_ hadn't known until the demon reached the lowest branches, where a near-constant breeze stirred the outer leaves. He'd told Jade and she'd just nodded, saying Bec was ready if he tried anything! Way to keep your brother up to date on important goings-on, Jade.

Since the demon wasn't one of the few full-grown ones, he didn't flip out and sound the alarm, but he did spend the next few hours getting a constant stream of information from the breeze on the intruder's progress. Eventually the demon's muscles started shaking with exhaustion and John had actually considered giving him a ride up on the wind, afraid he was going to slip. Sure he might be an enemy, but he might not, and that would be a really sad thing to have happen! As it turned out, after a rest on one branch as broad as the base of a small hill, the demon was able to stubbornly finish the climb with no accidents. John had held the wind ready to catch him the whole time, just in case.

"...Fuck me," the demon muttered in disgust.

Jade grinned. "Well, funny you should mention that!" John rolled his eyes, but the demon only looked bewildered as he glanced back at her, big red and yellow eyes blinking under his scowl. From the side it was obvious that he had really nice eyelashes.

"Mention wha - "

"So you started watching us because you were curious about angels?"

"Either that or I'm fucking suicidal. But suicidally stupid is my guess." He seemed to have settled on mostly not looking at Jade, staring blatantly off to one side with occasional darting glances at her face. John had a much better view from this angle, and he really was a cute demon. His horns were funny and small and he had little sharp teeth that kept nibbling at his lower lip, which did look pretty nibbleable. Also his tail was flicking like a cat's and that was just funny.

"Good! I just wanted to make sure no one sent you to spy on us."

His mouth dropped open and then his arms started flailing again to fully express his disbelief. "Who the _fuck_ would send a wing-ripped mutant pile of shit to do that? To do anything they wanted to succeed, which given that the peace truce seems to have worked well for the last nine sweeps, I can't imagine why we would _need_ to spy on you, so sure they might just send me out to get killed for a laugh I guess - "

"No!" Jade said firmly, "that's it! No more killing talk from you, mister! I declare an end to it! One more mention of me killing you and I will spank you!"

John groaned and smacked himself in the forehead, secure that his perch was well out of earshot. God, Jade. Don't threaten and flirt with the demon at the same time, that's not nice!

At least at this point it was as clear as it could get that he really was no danger to them. He didn't seem interested in lying, and even though he was afraid for his life he was making no attempt to defend himself. Which actually bothered John a little, because that didn't seem right. If he didn't want to fight he should at least be prepared to dodge or run or something, right?

The demon's mouth flapped for a minute before he managed words. "Fine, if you don't want to... kill me, interrogarrote me, whatever - what the fuck do you want? Can I slink away to hide my miserable form in a hole yet?"

"Well, I guess you can if you want," Jade said. "Or we could have sex!"

The demon's face went the darkest grey-red yet and his eyes went almost round. "We could... what. No, what. What. The fuck."

Jade grinned and cupped her hands under her oh god she was bouncing them at him _Jade_. Jade _no_. Bad! "You like my boobs, right? Wouldn't you like to touch them? And other things?"

"...Your rumble spheres are very nice," he said in a strained sort of rasp. John snorted and almost went into a coughing fit laughing because _rumble spheres!_ "...Why the _fuck_ would you let me anywhere near them? You were just suspecting me of wanting to restart the war or something, why are you proposing - is this an angel-style joke, is that it? You can't think of anything to say, so you suggest the most nonsensical thing you can think of and wait for me to laugh? Ha fucking ha, there are you happy? Have I fulfilled your humor-recognition needs sufficiently to be allowed to leave yet?"

"It's not a joke, stupid! Though it might turn into one if you just keep talking, sheesh! You want to have sex with me, right? I like sex. So let's have sex!"

He stared at her for another long moment. "I am trying to imagine what catastrophic alteration to the normal rules of the functioning universe could possibly make you want to have sex with the least attractive or desirable being to ever achieve a vague semblance of sentience. My fucking imagination is not that good, so I have to assume - "

"No! Stop saying bad things about yourself, it's stupid and boring!" Jade narrowed her eyes. "This is really simple. Answer yes or no: Do you want to have sex with me?"

He glared at her, then looked away to scowl at an innocent table. "Who the fuck wouldn't? That's not the fucking _point_ \- "

"Oooh, flattery!" Jade clapped her hands. "That's much better. All right, so take your pants off!"

John watched the demon's face cycle through alarm, desire, and confusion, settling on suspicion. He made no move to take his ragged red pants off. It was probably time to stop watching, but it was really strange how the guy definitely seemed to want Jade and at the same time couldn't stand to believe she might want him. How the heck was she going to convince him to take her seriously?

Jade pursed her lips and frowned, then took two long steps forward and grabbed the demon's nubby little horns as he tried to scramble away. Hauling him up onto his knees as he hissed at her, she pulled back on his horns to tilt his face up, bent down and kissed him.

His body went rigid. One hand flailed out, brushed the lacy cloth of her skirt, claws catching, tearing it a bit, then hung in the air for a second before slowly, gingerly settling on Jade's hip.

Okay, at this point it was definitely time to go do something else.

A muffled moan from the demon had a sort of rasping chirp in the middle of it, and his tail quivered and suddenly tried to wrap around Jade's calf, tangling in her skirt. That was weirdly cute... or maybe hot was the word John was looking for?

Aaand he was still watching this. He should really... He should...

He should admit that there was no way on earth he was going to look away. There was just something about the demon, he was so snarly and angry and hopeless. John wanted to pester him until he forgot about being angry at life to be annoyed at John instead. Or fuck him into forgetting to be upset over anything ever again.

But Jade had gotten there first, because like an idiot John had said he wasn't interested. It was much too late to change his mind now. (Jade wouldn't mind if he went down to join in. She'd suggested sex with all three of them involved to start with - but no. He'd already made his decision. He would just have to watch from up here, because Jade wouldn't care about that any more than she'd mind sharing the demon, and try not to be jealous.)

Jade pulled away, brown cheeks flushed, eyes very bright. "You're good with that tongue! I can think of some ways that could come in handy."

She was still holding onto his horns, so the demon couldn't move his head. Looking dazed, he tried to glare, but the attempt was solidly undermined by the way he was panting and leaning in to her. "Is that so," he growled. "Like what."

Jade grinned and let go of one horn to haul the front of her skirt up to her waist and John hastily altered his angle of view again to more demon and less Jade. Sure, he'd seen his sister naked before, but he tried not to be an expert on the topic, even if he knew his squeamishness was weird. It was just how he felt, he couldn't help it.

Red eyes went wide, flicked up to Jade's face, down again. The demon frowned. "You're _furry_."

John whooped with laughter, then clapped a hand hastily over his mouth, grinning. Demons were hilarious!

Jade frowned right back. "Aren't you? Come on already, let me see!" She let go of his other horn to grab for the waist of his pants and the demon grabbed her wrist in one hand and his waistband in the other, holding tight.

"No, fuck, that's not - You wanted me to do something with my tongue, right? Which I keep in my squawk gaper, not my pants, so there's no fucking need for a pants-delving expedition yet! I mean whatever it was you wanted me to do, I can fucking do that, you are absolutely correct that I am a fucking genius with this tongue, just - "

"Why are you scared? I'm not going to hurt you!"

"I'm not fucking scared!"

Jade snorted. "Of course you're not! That's why you don't want me seeing in your pants. Really, though, it's not like I'd laugh or anything!"

"Why the fuck would I be worried about that?" he growled.

"Oh. Well, good!" She let go of his waistband and patted his hair. "You don't have to take your pants off yet, I guess. We can wait for that."

The demon coughed awkwardly. "So, um, you want me to, like, suck your bulge? I can do that, like I said, a fucking genius is me, this tongue is vastly skilled, you will have no complaints whatsoever in any fucking way - "

Wow, he was almost reminding John of Dave, suddenly!

And Jade too, apparently. She tilted her head at him, tapped a finger thoughtfully on her mouth, and said, "Have you ever done this before?"

Instead of looking offended like Dave would've, though, he gave her a look of complete disbelief. "What, pailed a fucking angel? Sure, obviously, angels just sneak into my respiteblock in a steady stream, desperate for a taste of my mutant bulge. Feathery assholes follow my every movement, begging for the coveted touch of my - "

"No, I mean have you had sex at all," Jade said.

"Oh. Yeah. I mean. Yeah, a few times." He wasn't looking at her now, though, and John mentally translated to 'once, and reviews afterward were not overwhelmingly positive'. Which wouldn't be a shock, because whose first time was really outstanding? John's first had been with Roxy, and it was silly and fun but not exactly like he'd hoped. Sex took practice, like anything else!

"Oh! Good," Jade said, grinning. "Then maybe you already know what to do with your tongue!" She pulled her skirt up again.

The demon glanced up at her uncertainly, his face going ruddy again, then lifted a cautious hand up under the folds of skirt. John couldn't see exactly where he was touching, but it looked like he was maybe stroking her stomach?

"You really don't have any hair there?" Jade said. Oh. Not her stomach.

"No. Scale patterns, no fur." His brows pulled together in determination and he leaned closer. Jade shifted her feet farther apart and the demon blinked. "Um. Does your bulge not extend any farther than that? Or do I need to - " His tongue came out, flicked under the shielding bunch of cloth and WOW that was a really long tongue! John shifted, suddenly reminded that these shorts were pretty small.

"Ohhh," Jade sighed. "Is that what you call a bulge? No, it doesn't ex - oh - extend at all. Um. Yeah, up and - oh, up and down, yeah, like - _Mmm_."

Oh. Okay, wow, even if John wasn't watching Jade, he could still hear her, and that was a little weird (although it shouldn't be, Rose hadn't had a problem when Dave was having sex in the next room, probably mostly because it gave her material to bug him for the next year. John just had this odd hang-up). Still, the look on the demon's face, the concentration, the way his eyes narrowed as his hands came up to hold the skirt out of his way, pinning the folds of cloth against Jade's hips as he held on to guide her against his mouth - John sucked in a hard breath and squirmed, pressing his hands against the smooth bark of the branch he sat on. He was not going to start touching himself to this. Fuck, why was a scowly angry scared demon so absurdly sexy?

By the time Jade's breathing had grown harsh and quick, John was really uncomfortable. Obviously this had been a terrible idea, but he couldn't seem to find the control to persuade the air that he'd changed his mind now. The demon's eyes kept closing, he was breathing hard and John was getting pretty curious about what he had in his pants, because while the cloth over his crotch was definitely tenting out, it was also moving.

Jade grabbed the demon's head in both hands and shuddered and John closed his eyes for a minute, taking a deep breath. Okay, that's over, he told his body pointedly, now calm down! His body continued to make him aware that his shorts were much tighter than could possibly be healthy right now.

"Um," said the demon. "It's fucking clear! Are you okay, shouldn't it be green, or, I don't know, brown or something?"

"Shouldn't what be," Jade said, sounding a little dazed. She stepped away, swaying slightly as her skirt tumbled back down to her ankles, and the demon swiped the back of one hand across his mouth and held it up.

"Your genetic fluid!"

"Oh!" She laughed. "That's not actually genetic fluid, I don't make that, but yes, whitish-clear is normal for us. Does yours come in colors?" She sounded fascinated and for once John couldn't blame her.

"Yeah, the same colors as our blood. That's not how yours works?"

"Well, we all have the same red blood and the same clear fluid, so - are you okay?"

"You have red fucking blood?" He sounded funny, maybe uncertain or excited, John couldn't tell, and his eyes were fixed on Jade's face like he could pull the answer out by power of will.

"Yeah, when it's oxygenated by our breathing the iron in it turns it red!"

"Red, like, rust-colored?" he said cautiously.

"No, no, really red. Ah! Like your eyes! Just about the same color, I think."

Very slowly, the demon rolled off his knees to sit down on the floor, staring straight ahead of him. One clawed hand rubbed over his face. "Like fucking angels," he muttered to himself.

"Hey, are you okay?" Jade crouched down in front of him, peering into his face.

"Oh, fucking fine. No problems here. Yes, absolutely, I am overflowing with utter fucking delight that the mystery of my entire useless existence has finally been explained. I'm such a pointless and pathetic specimen of a demon because some fucking majeneticist obviously created an imp with angel blood and then instead of culling it at the end of the experiment, handed it off to the jadebloods for a laugh. Now it all makes sense. My life is a joke."

"You sure look like a demon to me!" Jade said. "So you aren't supposed to have red blood?"

"No," he said flatly.

"Huh.   Well, I think you're cute! And you were right about your tongue. You're really good with it! Are you just as good with other things?" She leered cheerfully at him, then when he gave her a blank stare in return, looked pointedly at his crotch and back up, raising her eyebrows.

"O-oh. Uh. I don't - Except, no, if your bulge is that small your nook is probably tiny too, we aren't even fucking computable. This was a fucking terrible idea. I should go."

"What the - _why_ \- " Jade started in annoyance, and someone just behind and above John spoke over her.

"Hello, John," said the familiar dulcet, amused voice, and John whipped around so fast his folded wings almost made him fall over.

"Rose!" he stammered. "Uh, hi! What are you doing here? Wow, I really wasn't, uh, expecting you - "

"That's entirely understandable, given the intensity of your focus on Jade and her young friend. Otherwise I'm sure you'd have sensed me approaching some time ago." She flipped her wings and landed next to him on the branch, smiling in her usual knowing way. Her gauzy skirt fluttered once and settled around her calves. In deference to the heat her shirt was less demure than usual, baring stomach and arms, and the pale skin showed swirling lavender tracery that currently held no glow. At the moment, the Seer wasn't Seeing anything.

"Um!" John said, and hastily convinced the air to stop carrying the sounds and images up from the cottage. Of course, Rose could still Look and see whatever she wanted, but at least now she wasn't watching John be an obvious voyeur.

Except that nothing naughty had been taking place just now, and actually it sounded like the demon had been trying to stop it from happening at all? John should probably not be worried about that, since it wasn't a big deal one way or the other. Sure, Jade would be annoyed to be thwarted, but she'd be fine.

But what about the demon? Jade had scared him and he'd still gone on his knees for her and she'd had a really good time, and now he was just going to leave? He was so prickly and cute in a ragey kind of way, and he wanted it and he wouldn't reach for it, so John wanted to poke him about it and then laugh and give it to him. (And, uh, the other meaning of that phrase too, but he was trying not to think about that because his shorts were still _way_ too tight.)

"So, um, what brings you here?" John said, trying to smile.

"Oh, meddling, of course!" Rose's smile was much more natural than his felt. She leaned in a little closer. "You should probably go down and catch him before he runs away."

"Wha - what?"

"Aunt Rosa's visions and mine indicate the most desirable future outcome is the result of your joining Jade's current attempt at a liason with your illicit visitor."

"Are you _serious?!_ "

"I assure you, we are both entirely Seer-ious," she said, as straight-faced as a Strider.

John groaned, then froze. The demon and Jade were yelling now, loudly enough to be heard from up here.

"You should go, before he gets out the window," Rose said.

"But Jade could just - "

"I believe Jade has had enough of trying to convince a paranoid, self-loathing demon to relax and have some fun. While I understand if you wish to decline, if you have any desire to 'get a piece of that,'" she spoke the Roxyism with very Rosely enunciation, "I urge you to summon large amounts of patience and take the chance now."

John stared at her for a second, nodded once and dove off the branch.

"AAGH!" Jade shrieked from inside the cottage. "Why are you so stubborn and stupid?!"

"I should've fucking known better!" the demon snarled back, and his voice was much closer to the window. "Good shit never happens to me, it's always a tease and then a kick in the fucking tail! I am getting the fuck out of here, unless you want to send your pet to rip me to shreds, which, feel fucking free, by the way!"

John swooped down and perched in the window in a crouch, ducking his head a little to fit. "Um, hi," he said as the demon whipped around and stumbled backward in shock, claws coming up defensively.

"Well, I was wondering when you were going to come back, dumbbutt!" Jade said crossly. "Why did you stay so close this whole time if you weren't going to do anything?!"

"Uh. Ahaha, ha," John said, a bit sheepish. He swung his legs inside to stand and maneuver his wings through the window. Of course she'd felt him filling space nearby, it wasn't like she wouldn't notice that...

"Oh my fucking snake gods," the demon said, turning to try to watch both John and his sister at the same time. His tail swished through the air in agitation. "This whole fucking thing was a set-up! I can't fucking believe - what, were you supposed to come in and catch us? And then you'd both say - "

"No!" John half-yelled, certain he didn't want to hear the rest of whatever awful fantasy the demon was spinning out. "No, we just both were sort of talking about having sex with you, and I said I wasn't going to, but then I sort of changed my mind. Um. Because I would like to. Have sex with you. But you don't have to if you don't want to."

The demon stared at him, open-mouthed.

After a moment of silence, John prompted him. "So, do you want to?"

"Ugh, you can't ask him that," Jade grumbled, "he won't answer, but he does, it's pretty obvious. Ooh, I know! Demon sandwich! That's perfect, don't you think?"

On the one hand, John's shorts were not getting any roomier with that suggestion, and it really kind of hurt by now.   On the other, a demon sandwich involved having sex right next to his sister. He was pretty sure he could do it, especially if he just concentrated on the demon, but it'd still be weird. Rose had said this was a good idea, though, so he had to try.

He swallowed and looked at the demon, who still seemed incapable of speech. "Do you want to have sex with both of us? At the same time, I mean." He might not like that, of course, some guys wouldn't, but John wasn't set on getting inside him, so they could work it out however.

The demon closed his eyes and shivered. He was breathing faster and his face was flushed again. It definitely looked like he was interested, but maybe also like he wished he wasn't.

"Of course he does, just look at him!" Jade said, bouncing. "Come on, let's get naked!"

John stepped over to the demon, who twitched back, then caught himself and straightened up, glaring. He was half a head shorter than John, and looked like he knew it only too well. "Hey. I don't know how it works for demons, but most of us think it's pretty important to only have sex with people who want to. So, I'm gonna say if you want this, you should nod or something, and if you don't, we'll let you go. Okay?"

The demon's lip curled in a snarl and he glowered like he wanted to claw John's face off. He hunched a little and glared cautiously over in Jade's direction.

"Oh, fuck you, demon!" Jade snapped. "I wasn't going to stop you from walking out! You looked like you were enjoying yourself before. Can't we try a sandwich with you?"

Red eyes glowered back at John, drifted down his chest, snapped back up as the demon swallowed. Then he jerked his head in a stiff, reluctant nod.

"Yaaay, naked time!" Jade said, and shucked her skirt and jewelry, then darted over to start pulling at the demon's pants. This time he offered no resistance, just scowled at John and flushed ever darker as Jade pushed the cloth over his hips and tail and down his -

"Whoa," John said in tandem with Jade's delighted "Oooh!"

Demon boys had slick red tentacle-dicks, apparently. It curled and squirmed against his abdomen, leaving wet pink trails behind over the gleam of tiny red scales that patterned the grey skin.

"What?" the demon growled, kicking off his pants. "Yes, it's fucking red, unlike your bizarre angel bulges I guess. But yours doesn't even extend from its sheath, so how am I the weird one here?"

"Actually," Jade said helpfully, "if a bulge has to do with direct reproductive function, mine's not really a bulge at all, it's purely for pleasure! It doesn't have a sheath and it doesn't extend because it's just a little happy-button!"

John didn't bother taking off his armbands, but pulled off the wooden wrist cuff. He finished struggling out of his constricting shorts without looking at anyone.

"How the fuck do you not have a - Oh my holy fucking shit."

"On the other hand, that _is_ an angel bulge!" Jade continued. "As you can see, it also has no sheath, but it has considerably more size than mine."

"Jade, stop looking at my dick," John sighed.

"Snakes fuck me," said the demon. "Why isn't it moving? Why is it just weirdly sticking out there? Are you bored, or is there something I have to - " He stretched out a tentative hand to touch the head and John groaned over the sound of Jade's earnest explanation of arterial dilation and tissue constriction.

"No," he gasped, "that's how it's supposed to look. It doesn't move on its own."

"And you want to put that in my nook?" He nibbled on his lip. "It might be too big, did you fucking think of that?"

"Wait, you have a nook?" Jade interrupted. "Do all demons have both?"

"Angels don't?"

"Guys," John said, trying not to whimper, because the demon was still patting his erection, curling his fingers around the width of it, squeezing just hard enough to feel. "Look, we can have comparative anatomy lessons now, or we can have sex! I vote for sex now, lessons later! And don't even complain," he said to Jade. "You've already gotten off once, remember?"

"Oh, fine, you big baby!" Rolling her eyes, she fetched the bed from where she'd left it on the table and set it down in the middle of the floor. It was barely the size of her palm, but she began humming rhythmically and it grew until it filled most of the available space, which was why she shrank it every morning. A big bed was nice, but so was room to move.

The demon was staring. "Angel magic is so fucking weird," he muttered.

"I bet yours is weird to us, too!" Jade said.

"Your concupiscent platform looks like a bird's nest."

"No, that's your hair," John said, grinning.

"Birds don't have as many blankets and pillows," Jade pointed out, "and it's more oval than round so it fits against the curve of the wall! Everybody ready?"

"If you're afraid I won't fit, I don't have to get in your nook," John told the demon, feeling his face warm. He didn't even know what a demon nook looked like, if it was anything like what angel girls had. "We can do something else, you can just, you know, use your hands - "

"Oh, like I'm a fucking imp just learning what a bulge does? No, we will fucking do this properly. Don't even fucking lie, you'd rather be in a nook, anyone would."

"Maybe with demons," Jade suggested, plopping down on the bed to arrange the pillows, "but angels are a little more flexible. Do you like having something filling your nook? Because not everyone does, you know."

"Yes, I fucking - I - Yeah, I, I do."

"Oh, okay!" Jade grinned and scooted back to the pile of pillows she'd pushed against the wall, arranging her half-spread wings comfortably to either side. "Come over here and kiss me again."

The demon looked uncertainly back at John, who cupped his cheek and leaned down to steal a kiss first. Red eyes widened, then flickered closed and he made a little breathy chirping noise.

"Mm. You make the best sounds," Jade murmured, watching.

John caught his breath in agreement as that long, skilled tongue stroked up against his, soft and rippling. "Hahhhh - Wow, you are good at that," he said, reluctantly pulling away.

Clearly not knowing how to respond, the demon frowned at him and got on the bed, crawling over to Jade, and from behind John caught a glimpse of a wet red-grey slit between his legs, which really didn't look as strange as he'd expected. Jade grabbed the demon's horns and pulled him in to kiss him, but he knocked her hands away and jerked back against the other wall, snarling, chest heaving.

"What the fuck, no! I thought you said you wanted me to agree to this, was that a fucking joke, a trick to get me pinned between you, what the fuck are you trying to pull!"

"Uuugh, you are such a jumpy dumbbutt! What's wrong now?!"

" _What's fucking wrong - ?_ "

All the snarling was giving John's libido whiplash. He took a deep breath, summoned the patience that Rose insisted he had, and hoped there would be a serious sex reward for his endurance soon. "Hey, Jade didn't mean to scare you, okay? Just try to calm down, and - "

"Don't fucking conciliate me!"

John rolled his eyes. "Then calm yourself down already! We need to know what happened so we won't do it again by mistake, idiot!"

The demon stared at him from under suspicious furrowed brows, looked over at Jade, back at John. "...You don't have horns. You, you don't know?"

"Noooo," Jade groaned, shoving her hands into her hair in annoyance. "We don't know anything about demon horns, why would we? So tell us already! Um, I didn't hurt you, did I?"

He stared at her for a long moment, then ducked his head to glare at the bed. "Don't - just don't mess with them anymore. They're too fucking small, if you grab them you're already too close to the hornbeds, and you don't want to touch those. Not like my reflex is strong anyway, but still."

"What reflex?" John said, glancing at Jade, who shrugged, wings shifting.

"Never-fucking-mind, that's what! If you touch my horns again, no fucking sex, that's all you need to remember!"

"Okay," Jade said, frowning a bit, "deal! You know, you should have said something about this the first time if you felt so strongly about it!"

"Right, because I had every reason then to think you'd give a putrid, slime-oozing fuck what I wanted!"

"Hey!" John frowned at him. "She said you could leave if you wanted to, _or_ you could have sex, and then I said the same thing! Don't make it sound like we're just pushing you around, that's not fair!"

"Are you going to tell me shoving my head around by the horns was not a fucking threat display?" he snapped at Jade. "Are you really going to fucking say that?"

"Um, _yeah_ , dummy!" Jade threw back. "I was kissing you! Why would I want to threaten you? Some people _like_ being handled like that!"

John was just going to pretend that she might not be talking about Dave, because he didn't need to know that about his best bro. Even if it was sort of obvious. That totally didn't mean he wasn't going to use this for months of teasing material, though.

"Anyway, I'm sorry already!" She sighed. "I promise not to grab your horns anymore, okay? Can we have sex now?"

He stared at her a moment from under that permanent scowl. "Yeah. Fine."

"Kiss?" Jade said, and the demon crawled back to her and leaned in.

John knelt on the bed behind him and touched his shoulders, traced down over his scars. All his muscles tensed and the demon froze. "Is this okay?" John asked, lightening his touch.

"Fine," the demon muttered, and Jade hummed appreciatively as he went back to the kiss.

John leaned down and kissed the back of the demon's neck, wiry black curls tickling his nose. A husky chirp suggested that was good, so he placed kisses all down the demon's spine to his tail, which was smooth-skinned and muscled at the base. John kind of wanted to bite it, just gently, but he thought that was probably a bad idea, and there had already been enough demonic flipping out for one day, so he just kissed it too.

The tail jerked at the touch and the demon made a sweet muffled noise like a trill. Oh-ho!

Grinning, John licked a long stripe from the tail's base up its length, enjoying the startled sounding gasps and chirrs from Jade's end and the way the tail was quivering. That seemed to go well, so he planted his mouth on the base, which seemed to be most sensitive, and sucked and licked and -

"Aaaa _aaagh fuck!_ " the demon howled. "Stop fucking around and pail me already!"

Jade burst out laughing. "'Pail' me?"

"Rrrrgh - _fuck_ me!"

"Sounds good to me!"

"You first?" John suggested.

"We'll have to readjust either way, so sure!" Jade bent her knees and set her feet well apart, beckoning the demon. He leaned cautiously over, fortunately blocking John's view, but Jade's wings twitched and she made a soft hum of pleasure as the demon presumably slid in. His tail lashed once, then began jerking and twitching with no rhythm or pattern whatever. For Jade's sake, John hoped that wasn't what his tentacle dick was doing inside her.

As patiently as he could, John waited for them to get well settled. The demon was swearing softly, though not nearly as inventively as before so perhaps he was distracted.

"Well?" he growled over his shoulder after a few seconds. "Are you joining in on this crackpanned feast of terrible fucking ideas, or are you just going to sit there and idly groom yourself?"

"Oh! Yeah, okay. Um, just tell me if it hurts and I'll stop. Or slow down, or whatever."

He knelt between the demon's thighs, grabbed his tail to keep it from repeatedly smacking him in the chest, and very carefully nudged up against that slick red slit - what had he called it, a nook? The demon shivered and swore at him, so John pushed, just a little.

" _Fuck!_ Fuck, wait, oh fuck, _anh_. That's. Yeah, that's really fucking big, how do you even - " He stopped talking, just breathing hard as Jade stroked his hair, his chest, and John stroked fingers up and down his tail, massaged lightly at the base. The tip of him was barely in and it was hot and wet and tight, but he didn't want to hurt anyone and he would hold still until it was okay.

"Yeah. Yeah, keep - nnnhh." His tail twitched urgently and John grinned and rubbed it some more.

"Oooh!" Jade said, sounding startled. "Oh, yeah, do that again!"

"I didn't do it on _purpose_ , it does that when the dipshit back there - ohh _fuck_."

"Oooh, yeah, good!"

This tail thing was really working well for everyone! John tried rubbing the underside of the base and the demon _whined_ and rocked back against him. "Yes, fine, come on, in! Get in, fuck - "

John's hips twitched forward almost on their own. The demon yowled, then swore at John when he stopped, so he pushed carefully in, hot slick so wet all around him fuck oh man oh _fuck_. By the time he was in all the way, all three of them were breathing hard and moaning.

Jade pushed the demon back against John and got up on her knees so all of them could fit together better. John pulled back a little to thrust up and the demon made this breathy whine that sent a wave of heat across John's skin. On the other side, Jade let out a low, pleased noise. The demon's hands were shaking, one fumbling backwards to reach John, and he was cursing again in a voice that caught and shook so John could only hear half of it.

" - Don't, fuck, don't just, can't you - _nnnggh_ \- "

Another push, slow and careful. "What is it?"

" - nnngg _faster_ , why can't you, if it doesn't move any more than make it go faster, you fucking nookstain!"

John grinned. "'Are you sure it's not too big? I don't want to hurt - "

"No it is not too fucking _gaaahhh!_ " He panted for a second as John pushed into him more quickly, hands on slender grey hips to pull him down harder. " _Fuck_ , I... What the fuck is wrong with me, it should be - aaahhhh - it should be way too big, shouldn't even - oh fuck ohhh - feel good, it doesn't move right... _Nnnnhh_ , fuck!"

"Mmm, I can't say for sure," Jade said, breathless, "but your bulge is much more, mmn, slender than an angel boy's..." She paused to gasp, and her voice was less than steady when she spoke again. "...And it's working for me, the way it ohhhh... Um, wriggles and stuff. Maybe, um, ohhh. Maybe the width makes up for the... the lack of motion."

"It's not like - I'm not _moving_ , here," John grumbled. His wings were twitching and flexing behind him with every thrust and he was sweating.

"Different motion," Jade pointed out. "You don't, mm, writhe and twist! At least, Dave doesn't."

"Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck," the demon groaned, one hand hard on John's thigh under him, claws prickling, the other on Jade's hip.

"Tell us what you need," Jade purred.

"I - _anh_ \- k-kiss?"

Jade leaned in to kiss him and the demon whimpered into it, helpless and chirping. His hands fastened on her shoulders, hanging on her as he rocked against her with the impact of John's hips.

It was pretty sexy, but John felt a little left out. Which was dumb, because it was hard to kiss someone over your own shoulder, and everyone liked kisses. Well, he could still kiss the demon, just not on the mouth.

In this position John couldn't quite reach the back of his neck, which he'd seemed to like before, but a whole stretch of his spine was right there. John leaned in and sucked on a knob of his spine right between the shoulder blades, near the top of the big scars. The demon moaned and his tail thwacked against John's stomach, which stung, so John grabbed it and rubbed his thumb over the base, winning a much louder noise and a hand back on his thigh, gripping so hard the claws drew little pinpricks of blood. Ow. John winced and grinned, rubbed the tail's underside. This time the hand spasmed open, clawing at empty air as the demon twisted down against John, pulling away from Jade's kiss to gasp.

"Fuck, fuck fuck fuck, I, yeah, more - "

"Harder, or faster?" John asked.

"Nn, just... just like, this."

John well remembered Roxy's emphatic explanation at one point that when she said "Just like that" she meant " _Don't_ change ANYTHING", so he did his best to not get faster or harder with enthusiasm. It wasn't easy, though, because the demon felt really good, not only inside but the rest of his body too; the sleek curve of his back under John's hands, the warm taut flex of his thighs on John's as he pressed back and rocked into the motion.

"Oh," Jade whispered, and her wings began to jerk and quiver. John didn't even think, he just leaned a little to one side to see over the demon's shoulder and smiled. She was bent forward, eyes closed, hands on the demon's waist as she shook silently. It had been a little weird to start with, but at this moment, with pleasure running through him, John felt warm and fuzzy to see his sister get what she needed. It was nice. This had been a good idea.

"Oh, _fuck_ ," the demon panted, sounding shocked, "pail, pail, where the fuck is your - we're going to make such a fucking mess - "

"'S fine," John said, "we've got a towel."

"But where's your pail?!"

It was sort of funny the way this guy got wound up over _everything_ , and asking about a bucket in the middle of sex was random enough that John snickered a little, but he also patted one grey shoulder, trying to be comforting.

"Sorry, buddy," he said breathlessly, "don't have one on hand. Just relax."

"Ohhh," Jade sighed, slumping as her wings sagged and pulled in again. "Oh, that was nice."

"You _don't have_ a fucking - Wha... Did you just come?"

Jade laughed. "What, it wasn't obvious?"

"But you... you didn't... Shouldn't there be more this time?"

Too much talking! John grabbed the base of his tail and rubbed little circles on it with his thumb and won a startled chirr as the demon bucked into him. Leaning forward, he kissed the top of one shoulderblade, on the ragged edge of the wing scar.

The demon stiffened all over and shuddered. "What - " he said hoarsely. "What the - I don't - " Instead of finishing a sentence, he shivered again. Whoops, maybe that had been a mistake, he probably didn't want to remember however he'd gotten those scars. Quick, distraction!

"Jade, more kissing!"

"Ooh, right!" She obliged and the demon moaned into it.

John ran his hands soothingly up and down smooth grey flanks, over muscle and bone and the dip of more scars, and the demon melted between them. His hands clung to Jade's shoulders as he whimpered and chirped and squirmed, then his head ducked, his shoulders hunched, and every muscle in his body went tight. Including the muscles around John, which were rippling in a way that made him gasp.

The demon made a tiny choked noise and a hard shiver ran through his body. Heat spilled over John's thighs, lots more than he'd expected which was sort of weird, but all his skin was tight and hot with need and he couldn't really pay attention just now. He groaned, moving jerkily, pushed into the demon once, again, probably too hard, and now - _now - ohfuckyes_.

"Mm," Jade sighed. Far away, on the demon's other side, she chuckled and crawled off the bed.

Slowly, the shiny distant feeling began to fade and John eventually pulled back to let the demon move. Groaning, the demon flopped onto his side, edging around to put his back to the wall. His tail curled over his thigh.

John's upper thighs and groin were sticky with reddish-pink stuff, which was soaking into the blanket underneath him as well. He just stared at it for a moment.

"Uh. Wow. That's really - is that normal?"

"What about the phrase 'disgusting mutant piece of shit' was too complicated for you, you crackpanned nooksniffer?" the demon mumbled. For once he sounded more dazed than angry, and John had to snicker at those words said in that tone of voice. "'Course it's not fucking normal, it should be darker than that, not so bright."

"I meant the amount of it," he pointed out.

"Oh. No, that's the right amount unless you're an angel and somehow incapable of putting out more than a dribble of genetic mat- uh, fluid, whatever. Oh, fuck. No wonder you don't use pails, you could probably fit what you need in a tiny bowl or something. Mngh." He scowled at John, sleepy but still wary.

"Wow," Jade said, hands on her hips as she looked them over. "We made a mess! Here," she chucked a wet cloth at John. "You should both clean up. I already did. I'm not sure what to do about the blanket, though..."

John mopped the sticky pink off his skin and thought about using it on the demon, then just offered it to him instead. He'd unthinkingly expected to enjoy the afterglow in a snuggly pile of Jade and demon, but they'd pulled apart again as soon as they could move, and he wasn't sure what he thought about that. He kind of wanted a chance to do some more kissing, maybe try some things to see if the demon would relax and trust them at least somewhat, but was the demon even interested now?

"The fuck is this for?" he said, making no move to take the pink-stained cloth.

"Don't you want to get unsticky?" John said.

Without bothering to sit up, the demon stared at him and made an intricate rolling, curving gesture with his fingers. Unfamiliar magic sparked over John's skin and he snapped alert, but it didn't feel like any of the spells his dad had warned him about. Demon magic was definitely strange, he decided, dusty stone and heat prickle, crackling through his feathers and hair like static.

"Hey!" Jade said loudly. "What exactly - Oh."

The pink splotch on the blanket was gone, only a faint dampness to mark where it was, and the demon's grey skin was dry and clean. John blinked. Now that was handy. He tossed the wet cloth over the side of the bed on the floor, ignoring Jade's annoyed sound.

"Guess Jade was right, your magic does feel pretty weird to us!"

"Big fucking surprise," the demon muttered.

Wait. Clean grey skin, no red in sight - "Whoa, what - buddy, where'd your tentacle go?!"

"My _bulge_ is back in its sheath where it belongs, unlike certain douchebags who just leave them out as long as they fucking please, with no regard for decency or manners."

"Uh, I don't have a sheath!" John pointed out, grinning. "Mine doesn't retract. I can put my shorts back on if it bothers you, though."

"Bluh, it's too hot for clothes!" Jade said. "Now I'm naked I'm staying this way until the sun sets."

"This is hot?" the demon said.

"Of course!" Her wings flicked emphatically and she stared at him. "If you leave the shade of the tree, it feels like being baked!"

"It's warmer than this in most of the caverns," he said.

"Well, you all did build your colony under a dormant volcano," Jade said thoughtfully.

"Obviously angels just can't handle real fucking heat."

"Right, because your people are so superior to ours that you're paranoid and flip out over everything!"

"Whoa! Guys!" John protested as the demon sat up and bared his teeth at Jade. "Why are you fighting now? Can't we just snuggle and relax?"

The demon looked at him, and the set of the black brows over wide red eyes was perturbed. "Oh, you did not just flip ashen on us."

"Uh." John laughed, puzzled. "That sounds acrobatic. That's more Dave's style than mine."

"Of fucking course not." Grey cheeks ruddy, he looked away, raking claws through his hair. "What kind of tailsucking moron would even think that, this wasn't even about quadrants at all, obviously. Who would even want to quadrant with a crackpanned, filth-spewing mutant anyway? So no, no club because no spade, and obviously no fucking heart intended, I get that. I am not actually the complete idiot I fucking sound like."

John had no idea what most of those words meant, but he sort of thought some of the sense of it came through anyway in the awkward tone of that deep, growly voice. Even when he was using weird demon words and not saying anything comprehensible, the demon still broadcast his feelings all over the place.

"No heart intended?" Jade said, as John was opening his mouth to blather something. "What does that mean? Are you saying you don't think we like you? That's stupid, we wouldn't have had sex with you otherwise! Even if you are really annoying, you're also cute in a bitey, snarly kind of way, and someone needs to kick your ass when you talk down about yourself because you do it way too often and it's gross and boring and you need to stop!"

The demon blinked at her, mouth hanging open, and blushed darker. "I don't - are you saying... Okay, that can't be what it sounds like because there is no way you're either pale or jet for me and I... I don't fucking get angels," he finished in a mumble.

"Well, I don't get demons!" Jade said. "You make no sense, Mister Paranoid Boring-Self-Hate Snarly-Pants."

"Maybe we don't need to get each other all the time," John said, shrugging.  "I mean, we all had fun anyway, right?  So we should do this again!   A lot.  _I_ think."

"Yes, definitely!"  Jade flicked her hair back and bounced.  "Don't you think, Mr. Scowly?"

The demon stared from one to the other, eyes round under the dark frown.  "Angels are fucking insane," he muttered.

"Yeah, but you want to anyway, don't you?" Jade said, grinning.

The demon shrugged awkwardly.

"You do!" John said happily.  "Good!  Then we will.  But right now, we should snuggle."

"Nope.  I am way too hot for that!" Jade announced. "You two do what you want."

"Um.  You want to cuddle a little bit?" John said, looking hopefully at the demon.

The demon scowled at him, looked away, shrugged.  John easily translated this to 'yes' and grinned.

"Great!" He leaned in for a kiss, but the demon leaned away and put a firm hand on John's bare chest.

"But first, you're putting your ridiculously tiny lower-torso-coverings on."

John snickered and got up to put Jake's borrowed shorts back on. "Come on, buddy, they're not that small!"

Jade flicked her wings in amusement. "Hah! Yes, they really are!"

"They are fucking infinitesimal. They barely cover your weird angel anatomy. And they make your ass look all..." One clawed hand waved around and that blush wasn't fading at all.

"It does look pretty good, doesn't it!" Jade agreed.

"Ugh, Jade, stop looking at my ass!" he said, fastening the shorts.

Climbing back on the bed, he pulled the demon closer.  It was more awkward now with just the two of them, but John persevered.  The demon wasn't complaining; in fact he docilely allowed John to cuddle him, despite the usual fearsome scowl. John pulled him into his chest and stroked a hand down his back, and slowly, cautiously, the demon began to relax against him.

There. This was much better for savoring the afterglow, even if it was fading by now.

"You really are cute," he said. He couldn't help it, the demon was all sneakily snuggling into him while pretending he was just shifting around to get comfortable! It was unfairly adorable.

"Whatever, nookmunch." The words were muffled against his chest and the demon's tail stealthily wrapped around John's ankle. "Angels are crazy."

John smiled and kissed the tip of one horn, winning a soft chirrup. "Your face is crazy," he retorted.

One red eye peered up at him and a clawed hand patted at his mouth. "I understand now. Your bulge actually emits small amounts of liquefied sponge matter." The demon yawned, which was cuter than it should've been with that many sharp teeth. "Until the remaining sponge can take up the slack, you're left sounding like a tailsucking imbecile because you only have a tiny fraction of functioning sponge left. This explains the nonsensical dribble coming from your noiseflap." He yawned again and when his hand dropped it came to rest on the outside of John's thigh. John's warm fuzzy feelings over this were not dissuaded by the demon's determinedly casual what-my-hand-just-needed-a-place-to-rest air.

Jade was giggling. John was aware that had technically been an insult, but the language the demon used was so hysterical it barely registered. He smiled down. "Getting sleepy already? It's not even evening yet!"

"I'm normally nocturnal, bulgeknot," the demon mumbled. "Been staying up late..."

"Oh, to watch us!" Jade said from her seat at the table. She was poking around on her wrist-top, probably chatting with Roxy or Jake. "I noticed you're only around in the mornings usually. This is pretty late in the day for you! How come?"

"Couldn't sleep."

John's wings sort of wrapped around the demon of their own volition. That had been an awfully noncommittal response, and John wondered if the problem was insomnia or nightmares, or maybe just difficulty sleeping in a strange place. If the demon needed to nap now, that was okay. He made a nice snuggly lapful.

"Wha - oh." The demon looked at the feathery tent around them and John couldn't read his expression, but then he closed his eyes and nestled closer.

"Hey." John ruffled his hair gently. "I know demons don't share their names right away because it's dangerous for you, but since we just had sex, can you tell us yours?"

One eye opened, looked up at him, closed again. "Maybe later."

Well, it had been worth a try! It was only a little disappointing that he didn't trust them enough yet. "Do you want mine?" He'd kind of already dropped Jade's a few times, hadn't he? Not that it was dangerous for an angel, it just seemed a little unfair or rude or something.

"No. Wouldn't be fair," the demon added grudgingly after a moment, and John's pang of hurt over the refusal subsided. He stroked the demon's hair for a while until the little chirpy noises stopped getting bitten off and came freely, and soon after that changed to a soft whirring that rose and fell with his breathing.

"I think he's asleep," John said in a low voice.

"Well, don't wake him!" Jade said just as softly.

"Mmm, no' 'sleep," mumbled the demon, shifting in John's lap. "Who sleeps lying down. 's a concupiscen' platform, not a wheel."

"Oh, no?" John said, grinning down at him. "My mistake."

"Mmgh," he said, and a moment later the whirring started up again and John felt the coiled body go slack in unconsciousness.  He looked up at Jade and made a He's so cute I can't take it! face, and she grinned back and got up to hand him the wrist cuff he'd taken off, which was also a rudimentary wrist-top, but disguised as cool jewelry. He rubbed a finger over the iridescent shell inlay, then stroked along one carved wooden spiral to trigger the spell. If he wanted to do anything besides chat, he had to use a handheld unit that didn't look nearly as cool but was more powerful, but mostly he wore this one.

GG: see???  
GG: i told you it was a good idea!! :D  
EB: yeah, he's not like i thought at all!  
GG: next time maybe you won't be such a dumbbutt!  
EB: well, rose told me to come down.  
EB: she said us doing this was the most favorable future!   
EB: so i guess this little guy's a lot more important than he thinks?

Across the room, Jade's wings ruffled in surprise and John looked over at her.  She gave him an impressed look.

GG: wow!!!  
GG: i just thought itd be fun  
GG: but its going to make a really big difference huh?? :o  
EB: kind of weird, huh?  
GG: yeah no kidding!!  
EB: hey, actually, can you bring over my palmtop?  
EB: i don't want to move, because he sleeps pretty lightly and it seems like he needs it, but i'd like to play a game or something if i just have to sit here.  
GG: john are you really going to stay put while he sleeps? :O  
EB: why not?   
EB: he'll probably wake up after an hour or so, it's not a big deal.   
GG: okay! ;)  
EB: hey, no smirky winky faces!

The demon didn't wake after an hour, but by then he had rolled over and curled up with his back to John.  He was deeply enough asleep that when John folded his wings and crept cautiously off the bed, there was only a little grumbling noise before the peaceful whirring resumed.  John shared another So adorable! grin with Jade, who scrunched up her face.

GG: oh man i want to snuggle him so bad!!!  
EB: just wait until he wakes up!  
EB: if he's nocturnal, that should be like around sunset, right?   
GG: unless hes totally messed up his sleep cycle to watch us!   
GG: which is what it sounded like :\  
EB: well, then you'll just have to wait until tomorrow!  
EB: you should have taken your chance earlier, like me! :p  
GG: bluh! :p

Mostly, when they'd been inside all day, John and Jade would fly out together to catch the last of the sunlight on their wings, an evening snack before bed, but this time they took it in turns just to make sure the demon didn't wake up alone. John saw Jake and Roxy and Rose at a distance, wheeling in interlocking circles, and he waved but didn't go to join them. There would be time to talk later, when he didn't have a sexy guest! He thought Rose smirked at him, but she was too far away to be sure.

The demon didn't wake at sunset or afterwards, and eventually John and Jade crawled into bed and stretched out on either side of him.  He sort of huddled into himself and stopped whirring for a moment, but Jade stroked his hair and John spread out his near wing over him, and after a bit he sighed and relaxed again.  John smiled and fell asleep when the whirr picked up again.

When he woke at sunrise, the demon was gone.

He looked over at Jade, who was sitting up already, looking around.

"Is he - "

She shook her head, chewing on her lip.  "I can't feel him anywhere near the tree."

John rubbed a hand across his face, trying to wake up enough to think past the stupid hurt feelings.  The guy was a demon, stubborn and paranoid, they'd known this to start with.  "Did we hurt him somehow?  Scare him?"

Jade took a deep breath and frowned. "Maybe.  Maybe he liked us and that scared him.  He doesn't like himself much, maybe he doesn't think he should have good things.  Or maybe he's just not used to it."

John nodded.  "I guess it'd be a bad idea to go after him, even if we knew where he'd gone.  So - we just wait for him to come back."

"We'll wait for a few days," Jade agreed.  "Then we'll go look for him."  She smiled at John, and he breathed in and smiled back.

**Author's Note:**

> Holy smokes, pesterlogs are not simple. I think I've got it figured for the moment, though. Authors who do these things all the time deserve an award, sheesh.


End file.
